18th September 2022

I oft do sit either drowsing or hard asleep, turning over past, present, futures all, as if any such moments might be made quite changeable, controllable, capable of neat manipulation, to be ever helpful by falling in line with wishes, desires, instead of being controlled by the purest chance, a roll of the most arbitrary of dice, with outcome completely random, erratic, uncontrolled.

Like everyone else I heartily dislike serendipity. Long experience having taught me that luck is a but a two faceted coin that will prove cruel and inconsiderate at minimum half of the time. I much prefer to only welcome certainly, the goodly promise that progress will follow patterns ever agreeable to my inclinations, a circumstance that will require the spending of endless hours of skullduggery to ensure results indisputably only favorable to the principal party, myself.

 But truthfully any such sureness would prove far too predictable, fixed, conclusive, boring. Gambling is the spice of life, prime source of both appetite and satisfaction.

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